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Stanford "Ford" Filbrick Pines ([personal profile] cryptograms) wrote2020-09-06 03:13 pm
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clocktowers: (/= sᴏ why are they pointed)

cw suicidality and talk of death

[personal profile] clocktowers 2021-02-16 04:37 am (UTC)(link)
[ Ah.

There is an unpleasant jolt of surprise when he reads the message, and from there it settles into... a particularly weary unease. Honesty does not come easily to Ozpin. Speaking openly about himself only ever complicates a situation, and he is used to resorting to it only under particularly fraught circumstances. It always means that something has gone wrong.

He does not begrudge Qrow for whatever amount of the story he shared: it was undoubtedly kind of him to warn Stanford that Oz may not be returning. Oz cannot pretend there was no risk of that. There have been times in his life he would have gone in to that peace fully and gladly.

This is not quite one of them. He has promises to uphold, these days. ]


Qrow understands that I have a rather complicated relationship with death.

But I also have a great deal of unfinished business, as it were.


[ This hangs a moment, and then a stab at levity: ]

Rest assured you won't be rid of me that easily.
clocktowers: (/ (ᴏᴏʜ ᴏᴏʜ))

cw suicidality and talk of death

[personal profile] clocktowers 2021-02-16 01:56 pm (UTC)(link)
[ He expects questions. He expects to be, in this moment, a new oddity to study.

What he gets instead is a Thank you.

Ozpin sits with that in silence, and does not examine what he is feeling. It is something larger and sharper than he wants to grapple with. This is a conversation he expected, upon returning, but not from Stanford. Stanford has none of the background, none of the context, no way to parse that immortality is at best a burden and at worst an agony that some (that she) would tear down the whole world to escape.

Ozpin has thought a great deal about his death. He does not think it will ever come peacefully. It will come as an act of surrender, or defeat, and the casualties will be beyond imagining. Here in Deerington, that is not strictly true: here it is simply a death, no greater or more significant than any other.

Except that he still needs to return to Remnant. Whether he wants to return is irrelevant; there have been stretches of centuries in which Ozpin has not wanted to carry on his mission. He carries it on regardless. If he does not, every man, woman, and child on the planet will die.

He is ready to rest, but not to see the rest of humanity pulled under.

So, finally, Ozpin texts back. ]


It's alright. I think it is time I told you the story and let you ask your questions.

Tomorrow?
laminae: (unsure)

[personal profile] laminae 2021-02-16 05:02 pm (UTC)(link)
ok cool, good to know those line up at least
not that
i'm really thinking about getting that far
we're still trying to figure out kissing

probably, i never asked him for deets and i've never dated a rainicorn
clocktowers: (== you can't trust)

[personal profile] clocktowers 2021-02-16 06:40 pm (UTC)(link)
You're welcome to join me here. We can talk in the library.

[ Stanford's home is not, he thinks, terribly ideal for sitting and having emotionally charged conversations. He'd be unsurprised to find the other Pines men listening in— Dipper seems very intent on his spying— and the couch-slash-bed does not make for elegant seating arrangements.

But then, the library is loaded in its own way, given the night they'd spent there together. He is not making things easy for himself if he intends to tell his story from that same chair, with the both of them pretending not to think of it. Stanford had agreed to the dinner date. They are approaching the point where it will be foolish and juvenile to pretend there is nothing here.

(They may have passed that point some time ago.)

In any case, this is an important conversation to have in a known, comfortable place. He is not cowardly enough to invent a new location simply to meet somewhere free of memory and romantic overtones.

But it comes close. ]


Or we can meet at the pond, if you prefer.
clickclickbloom: (Let's forget about our problems)

February 27th video: UN: RadRidingHood

[personal profile] clickclickbloom 2021-02-18 01:41 am (UTC)(link)
Hey Ford!

So... How'd dinner go last night????

Deets, Deets, Give me the deets!
bolstafir: (pic#13753719)

[personal profile] bolstafir 2021-02-18 04:00 pm (UTC)(link)
[For whatever it's worth, Qrow does not beat around the bush, at least. Once the window is opened, he flies inside and shifts back into a person before even searching for a perch of any kind.

It's only once he sees the tissues and medicine boxes and gets a proper look at Ford's face that it clicks for him that Ford had died too. The realization that he's back when Oz is not sends a creeping spike of cold up his spine. It only makes what he's come here to tell Ford all the more likely. He breaks eye contact almost immediately, staring between the blankets and the tv and hesitating. Telling him now feels rather like kicking a man while he's down, but Qrow tries to remind himself it would only be worse the longer he puts it off.

He takes a deep breath, running a hand through his hair, as he almost seems to squirm in place. There's almost a thread of guilt to his features, here.]


Listen, I've got to talk to you. It's about Oz.
bolstafir: (pic#13733966)

[personal profile] bolstafir 2021-02-20 12:02 am (UTC)(link)
[It strikes him, suddenly, that he's not sure if Ford even knows Oz died. If not, it's even more cruel to dump this on him, but....he has to start somewhere.]

He's not back yet. I...I don't think he's coming back.

[He considers, halfway through that sentence, softening it. Suggesting that he doesn't know why Oz isn't back, and leaving room for the possibility. But he remembers the agonizing months when Summer was still just "missing" rather than "presumed dead". It's not a kindness to lie to him, and put him through that process of steadily waning hope, of grieving without being sure.]

...I'm sorry.
bolstafir: (pic#13945112)

[personal profile] bolstafir 2021-02-20 12:52 am (UTC)(link)
[He has to break Ford's gaze to continue. Reluctance is painted all over his shoulders, the set of his jaw. He does not want to have to say this, or think about this. Doing the right thing here is more painful than he'd like.]

Because he has the choice not to.

[He sighs.]

Oz has wanted to die for a long time. It's never been able to stick, before.
bolstafir: (pic#13753760)

[personal profile] bolstafir 2021-02-20 02:27 am (UTC)(link)
[He blinks at the mention of Oscar. Qrow isn't sure how much Ford knows about the kid. He's trying to parse from the man's reaction how much he even knew about Oz's immortality. It seems the best to be vague.]

I don't know.

[None of Oz's hosts have been cut off from his soul at any point in the merging process, after all. Qrow is legitimately unsure what losing Oz might do to his soul in the long term. That, however, he keeps to himself.]

He's been handling it alright so far, but it's only been a day. We'll see how it goes.

[There's...a pause. He should leave it at that, and go. Certainly he's not close enough to Ford to comfort him; he barely knows how to cope with all this himself. But that guilt scratches at his ribs again. If he couldn't soften the blow for Ford, maybe the least he can do is soften the landing, just a little bit.]

For what it's worth...it's not you. You meant a lot to him. I haven't seen him light up like that with anyone, as long as I've known him.

[Qrow hadn't known what to make of this man when he'd first started lurking around their interactions, but over time it was readily apparent, how comfortable Oz seemed to be around him. How he cared enough to see Ford after he came back from Remnant, even when normally he'd have hidden himself away to avoid the messy work of explaining his condition. It's why Qrow has come to see him, after all. He is not some run of the mill acquaintance--Oscar, speaking of the kid, had confirmed that himself, months ago.]

But this might be his only chance to be free of what the gods did to him. None of us...could hope to stack up to that.

[There's a strange weight to his tone as he says this. A hurt that's not quite bitterness anymore, but isn't quite not. Qrow cannot find it in him to blame Ozpin for letting this one chance for a final death slip through his fingers, but he still remembers the day in the snow. Remembers the old story revisited over tea, of a callous old wizard who hid from the world, and how he had to be coaxed out, inch by inch, by the kindness and bravery of others. A story they were still living.

Retreat, he'd said, was the closest he came to rest. He has known Qrow for twenty years. He may have known the people of the Circle for longer.

It is not arrogance for him to be certain, without a shadow of doubt, that none of them are quite enough to measure up against the shadow of eternity.]
Edited 2021-02-20 02:34 (UTC)
bolstafir: (pic#13733772)

[personal profile] bolstafir 2021-02-20 03:54 am (UTC)(link)
[There is a moment where Qrow wonders what Ford was going to say, there. I'm not-- is the start to so many sentences, many of which he is desperately familiar with. He chooses to let it be, there, rather than press. It is hard enough to handle any of this already, and Qrow knows the weight of what he's had to say doesn't help.]

...Likewise. Take care of yourself.

[He shifts once more into his wings, and the bird is out of his window before anything more can be said.

Should Ford look out his window later that evening, though, he will find a thermos left there. It has no note, or anything else identifying it, save a fallen black feather that sits nearby. Should Ford risk actually consuming some....he will find a pleasant night of sleep awaiting him. One with no nightmares.]
charlastan: The Perfect Crime #1 - The Decemberists (You got to get your clock locked)

2/20 After Bill's post goes up

[personal profile] charlastan 2021-02-20 11:50 pm (UTC)(link)
HEY. HEY FORD.

CALLED IT!!!!!!


👈👈

[He did not call shit; he is jumping to conclusions.]
clickclickbloom: (How could you leave me)

[personal profile] clickclickbloom 2021-02-21 09:32 pm (UTC)(link)
[Oh. Right. Ford didn’t know she was sharing a body with Ozpin for a day.

Or that she was the one texting him that day.

Whoops. She can fix this! She knows she can.]


Oh my gosh!!! You guys actually followed through!

That’s adorable!!!

I’m so excited for you, Ford!

Oh right. Questions.

Well

I might have had something to do with Ozpin’s texts that day.

He was really sick and I was helping him let people know he was okay.

Might have gave him a little push to get the courage to ask you.

I’m so glad he did!!! :D <3 <3
charlastan: The Perfect Crime #1 - The Decemberists (Where they stock up)

[personal profile] charlastan 2021-02-21 09:38 pm (UTC)(link)
YEAH, THAT IS KINDA WEIRD.

YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT DENIAL THOUGH. SOMETHING SOMETHING A RIVER IN EGYPT, HE'S A PYRAMID, THERE'S A JOKE IN THERE SOMEWHERE.

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