[ Wow, that family dynamic sure is something. Ford would feel compelled to tell Qrow more about his own in the name of evening the score, except that he suspects Qrow would sooner dive out a window than be subjected to such an intimate conversation subject. It's something he'll be silently grateful for now and then, perhaps, address in more detail later.
Right now, the important thing is that Qrow's words help him orient his own thoughts. They don't exactly help, because Ford's problem is he doesn't have anyone that's even remotely as close to him as Stan and the kids were. ]
That was what we decided, too, when we left Deerington for Trench.
[ Ford takes a deep drink of his complimentary water before he continues. ]
Sorry. I asked because... I was on my own for thirty years. It didn't bother me at the time, and I thought I would be able to adjust after the kids went back to the sea, but...
[ He shakes his head, helpless. ]
Your letter made me realize I don't actually know how to be alone anymore.
[There is a moment, as Ford speaks, that Qrow thinks it's kind of funny they'd have quite a bit in common and not really find out for close to three years. Maybe because that's something else they share -- they are absolutely terrible at talking about themselves.]
I'll be honest, I have no idea what I'd do if I were in your shoes. Raven and I -- didn't exactly grow up in a standard way, let's put it like that. I didn't really know what it was like to ... have your life matter to people, and feel the same way in return, until I went to Beacon, met Oz.
[Until he became part of Team STRQ, his first family. His first real loss.]
I went on plenty of missions by myself, after we lost Summer, but there was always somewhere to come home to, you know? People to do it all for.
[Oz may have taught him to care for humanity at large, but the heart of it was always closer. It's always been about the people he loves and believes in -- whether it's keeping them safe or fighting to defend the ideals they cared about.]
I'd like to think if I was the last one standing in Remnant [a painfully possible if he tries desperately not to dwell on] or if the rest of them went back to the sea here, I could still carry on fighting for the things that mattered to us, but I dunno if I could keep from falling apart.
[If he had no obligations to keep him away from the bottle, would he be able to resist trying to drown that pain again? He doesn't know. It plagues his nightmares, at times.
There's an awkward sort of weight in the air that lingers after that, like he definitely has more to say but isn't sure if he should say it, before he finally speaks up again -- though he doesn't quite look Ford in the eye as he does it.]
...For what it's worth, even if you didn't -- get back with him, our families have been pretty well entangled since Deerington, and all, so. If you ever needed anything....
[Brothers, kill him now. He is not at all equipped to have this conversation properly and he isn't even cursed to keep going this time, he is absolutely screwing this up.]
[ Ozpin again, huh? He certainly is the sort to make an impression on people, and thinking about that helps Ford come around to the point that Qrow is making. It's not just his family that's important to Qrow - or maybe it's more like the people that are important to him weren't always his family. Some of them were strangers at first, people he might have never met if his life had gone even slightly differently.
Immediately, Ford knows he can't change his definition of 'family' to include people that aren't Stan, Dipper, and Mabel, and he knows that even if he could he wouldn't want to. But that doesn't mean the world has to be categorized into 'family' and 'everyone else' either. Already, Fiddleford is someone he'd consider more than merely a friend. He knows the Wendy and Soos are both similarly important to Stan, Dipper, and Mabel. And the people they've all come to know and care about here, too. Ruby, Willow, Oscar, Glitch, Ritsuka - and Qrow, of course. None of them family, but all of them something more than mere friends.
And he thinks it's probably the other way around, too. Certainly Qrow, at the very least, would not be subjecting himself to this horrendously awkward conversation if there wasn't some sort of critical connection between the Pines and the people of Remnant. It's annoyingly simple now that everything has fallen into place, and Ford can only sigh when he thinks about how thoroughly he missed the point prior to this. Mabel wouldn't be mad at him, but surely she'd pat him on the arm and give him that disappointed-but-sympathetic look. ]
At the very least, I know Ruby won't let it stand if she thinks someone she cares about is in trouble.
[ It's said like half a joke, because Ford desperately needs to get away from the emotionally raw and vulnerable parts of this conversation, and just as desperately needs Qrow to understand that Ford knows exactly what's being offered to him. ]
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cryptograms) wrote2021-09-04 07:34 pm
no subject
Right now, the important thing is that Qrow's words help him orient his own thoughts. They don't exactly help, because Ford's problem is he doesn't have anyone that's even remotely as close to him as Stan and the kids were. ]
That was what we decided, too, when we left Deerington for Trench.
[ Ford takes a deep drink of his complimentary water before he continues. ]
Sorry. I asked because... I was on my own for thirty years. It didn't bother me at the time, and I thought I would be able to adjust after the kids went back to the sea, but...
[ He shakes his head, helpless. ]
Your letter made me realize I don't actually know how to be alone anymore.
no subject
I'll be honest, I have no idea what I'd do if I were in your shoes. Raven and I -- didn't exactly grow up in a standard way, let's put it like that. I didn't really know what it was like to ... have your life matter to people, and feel the same way in return, until I went to Beacon, met Oz.
[Until he became part of Team STRQ, his first family. His first real loss.]
I went on plenty of missions by myself, after we lost Summer, but there was always somewhere to come home to, you know? People to do it all for.
[Oz may have taught him to care for humanity at large, but the heart of it was always closer. It's always been about the people he loves and believes in -- whether it's keeping them safe or fighting to defend the ideals they cared about.]
I'd like to think if I was the last one standing in Remnant [a painfully possible if he tries desperately not to dwell on] or if the rest of them went back to the sea here, I could still carry on fighting for the things that mattered to us, but I dunno if I could keep from falling apart.
[If he had no obligations to keep him away from the bottle, would he be able to resist trying to drown that pain again? He doesn't know. It plagues his nightmares, at times.
There's an awkward sort of weight in the air that lingers after that, like he definitely has more to say but isn't sure if he should say it, before he finally speaks up again -- though he doesn't quite look Ford in the eye as he does it.]
...For what it's worth, even if you didn't -- get back with him, our families have been pretty well entangled since Deerington, and all, so. If you ever needed anything....
[Brothers, kill him now. He is not at all equipped to have this conversation properly and he isn't even cursed to keep going this time, he is absolutely screwing this up.]
no subject
Immediately, Ford knows he can't change his definition of 'family' to include people that aren't Stan, Dipper, and Mabel, and he knows that even if he could he wouldn't want to. But that doesn't mean the world has to be categorized into 'family' and 'everyone else' either. Already, Fiddleford is someone he'd consider more than merely a friend. He knows the Wendy and Soos are both similarly important to Stan, Dipper, and Mabel. And the people they've all come to know and care about here, too. Ruby, Willow, Oscar, Glitch, Ritsuka - and Qrow, of course. None of them family, but all of them something more than mere friends.
And he thinks it's probably the other way around, too. Certainly Qrow, at the very least, would not be subjecting himself to this horrendously awkward conversation if there wasn't some sort of critical connection between the Pines and the people of Remnant. It's annoyingly simple now that everything has fallen into place, and Ford can only sigh when he thinks about how thoroughly he missed the point prior to this. Mabel wouldn't be mad at him, but surely she'd pat him on the arm and give him that disappointed-but-sympathetic look. ]
At the very least, I know Ruby won't let it stand if she thinks someone she cares about is in trouble.
[ It's said like half a joke, because Ford desperately needs to get away from the emotionally raw and vulnerable parts of this conversation, and just as desperately needs Qrow to understand that Ford knows exactly what's being offered to him. ]